This morning I realized one of our sprinklers wasn't working. The horror. I ripped its little head off and realized it must be the end of the line because there was some gunk from when we fixed our sprinklers last week. Also, as my finger fished around, there was a rock in it. I kept trying to "birth" the rock by turning the water on and trying to rotate it. It was like a shoulder dystocia, it just wasn't coming out, so we had to cut it off. I got my PVC cutters and got the head off. The rock was ginormous! I knew I was glad I cut the head off, there was no way I was going to get the rock out.
I went to the store and got the stuff to fix it, but I ended-up unhappy with the fix, we still weren't getting good coverage. SO, I went to Sprinkler World. They got me a head that I am 95% sure is perfect. Just need to check with Mr lawn mower when he gets home.
I obsess over fixing my sprinklers. And it's nothing I'm proud of, but I LOVE it when it's fixed. I love how it's all automated and it just does its job.
I think I like how I actually CAN fix it.
Unlike my kids.
I am up to my eyeballs in whine from princess P. She's fallen out of bed the past two nights since she went into her big girl bed. I'm pretty sure she's not getting good sleep, so we just need to work on it, but for me it's relentless HER.
El Presidante has continued a lying spell and while he has had straight A's in school, he suddenly didn't do his homework last night, and his teacher made him email me. I have talks about trust with him about every 8 hours. I'm not sure they're doing anything, and at this point we're mostly checking in and I'm telling him what good things he's done, and what not so good things he's done. I had to get a sitter last night because he was such a pill and I feel like I can't trust him.
And there' just no fixing it. There's no fancy amazing blue goo that will do what I need it to do with my kids. There's no going to Sprinkler World for a new head. It's just me, trying to make stuff work. And it often failing.
Today I read this book to Princess P before her nap. I think I was the one who got something out of it. Oh, how we'd waited for her. What a delight she is to my whole world. The things I made her and how much pain I dealt with to get her here. And now I can barely even stand her. I know, it sounds awful but I am so at the end of my rope with her.
And it got me to thinking about how good things require work. My sprinkler system is pretty good. It does what it's supposed to do, but I don't feel all that much pride from my green grass.
I adore my kids. When things are good, they are VERY very good (now, is not one of those times). And when they aren't they simply stink. I feel vast amounts of pride in what good people they are. So, even though they will never truly be "fixed" I need to remember to enjoy the works in progress and small miracles when things start to go right.
Because they were loved before they were born.